Questions for the week of Monday, September 24

1) If you stare at the total dollar amount in your checking account on the computer for long enough, will it increase and/or will your credit card debt decrease if you stare at that? (Staring is done "in horror"). I am testing that this week.

2) Is there a certain number of saltine crackers that if crumbled on top of soup, qualifies that bowl of soup as a meal as opposed to simply a bowl of soup? I think 22 saltine crackers might be the magic number.

3) Do all girls assume that by wearing big sunglasses to cover their face they are tricking men into thinking that they are attractive? I can see where this might work on some guys, but I think most of us are aware of this scheme.

4) I spent some time with some Hollywood hipsters over the weekend. The question is, how would you define a hipster? Everyone knows what they are, but they can be difficult to define. Here is urbandictionary.com 's stab at it.

hipster

Someone who thinks that they are being "special" and "unique" for liking some underground bullshit no one else cares about. And they pointlessly look down on people who don't know anything about indie culture, because that's the only thing they know anything about. They're quick to call the rest of the world conformists when in reality, they are the ones conforming by partaking in a "too cool for mainstream so i am going to reject it by looking and acting like a grungy asshole" way of life only to seem uber-fashionable. They just end up looking like idiots.

Hipster: I won't drink at starbucks, it's too corporate.

Non-Hipster: I want a Louis Vitton purse because they are cool

Hipster: You're such a conformist, having a Louis Vitton purse is so unoriginal. I like my purse I found in the gutter for $4 dollars.

Non-hipster: But it's ugly

Hipster: Yah, but no one else has it. It's completely unique.

Non-hipster: That bum over there has something pretty similar though.

Hipster: You're ignorant because you can't see the real beauty in life.I don't have time for this, I'm gonna go to my cave of an apartment and listen to some indie rock you've probably never heard of....

Non hipster: You need to see a therapist

Hipster: I am my own therapist.

PATT

Respect in Scottsdale

For a second straight year I was in Scottsdale for Labor Day weekend. Apparently I still haven't learned my lesson that you don't go to Arizona in late August. Maybe I'll get things figured out next year.

The weekend in Scottsdale was all about respect. Respect the father, respect the son, and respect the Jordan Jumpman onesie. Sundino has a beautiful baby boy named Gage Christopher Sundin(o). He has a beautiful wife named Sommer Sundin(o). And he has a beautiful house he can call his own. He is setting an unbelieveable example for what a real man is, and for an MIT (man in training) like myself, there is a lot that I can learn from him.























































It was also proven that any picture of a guy with two broken arms has a 100% chance of being a good picture. Respect to broken limbs.
















This picture demands respect. If you don't respect this crew, it's simple...imminent death.
















Respect to Jackie for sucking down drinks and flying across the country in planes. She never fails to impress. And never fails to be a huge tease!

And respect to the mountains of Phoenix. They don't look that big, but when its 110 degrees out, they present a formidable challenge for even Mt. Whitney-tested hikers.