You Don't Have to Grow Apart to Grow
I was electronically mailing with the man himself today, Mr. Jeffrey Parker, navigating our way through a number of topics including the writers' strike in LA, cute actresses from Louisiana, dead souls, and dropping temperatures. I then brought up a subject that has been on my mind of late...
All throughout childhood, I viewed post-college life as a time when I would be hanging out with my good friends, living our lives the way we want to, playing obscure sports like disc golf, jamming out on guitar, dating models, etc. I was fully aware of society's forecast for this time in life when people stray in different directions and don't keep in touch, work time-consuming jobs, get married, have kids, and do other foolish things. I just always knew that I wasn't going to go down that dark path. I was going to hang out with my friends and live life like we wanted to live, grow old together and grow as people, but not grow apart. Possibly all live in the same neighborhood, play golf between houses with plastic balls , barbeque in backyards, pass out in hammocks.
The way I've come to look at it, unless you are rolling with your crew, you will always just be tagging along with someone else's crew. And tagging along is no way to go through life.
Some might call me naive, but I always thought life could be like Friends or Seinfeld (or Sex and the City for the ladies) if that's how I wanted it to be. I've been working under that assumption for many years now. But lately I have started to ask myself, is this ever going to happen? Have I not put myself in the correct position to surround myself with my crew and breeze through my 20's and 30's in style?
Jeffrey doesn't think it's our fault. Yes, us, the few shining stars that have this utopian vision and are completely willing to do what it takes to live that way. He feels that the desolate days of life without your boys is bound to happen.
"These times would always happen, not because I, or we, did anything wrong, but because that is the normal workings of life. There are only a few that seem to not buy into it, I didn’t accept that life and those changes, the people I surrounded myself with did, and as an innocent bystander, I was either to be left behind or to get in line with the rest of the schmucks."
Maybe the grass is always greener. Whatever you have, you want what the other guy has. You want to meet the world, but you want to do it with your crew. You can't have it all.
Or can you? http://intheends.blogspot.com/2007/10/best-destiny.html
posted by Toastmaster @ 2:41 PM
3 Comments:
Best post yet...
I love that you have dedicated yourself to updating the blog on a regular basis. I've always viewed the blog as a vehicle in which "the rest of us" could maintain some time of connection with you even though you are 3,000 miles away. Along with the food-for-thought that you have stewed up, I give you a little dessert:
" The best day of your life is the one on which you decide your life is your own. No apologies or excuses. No one to lean on, rely on, or blame. The gift is yours - it is an amazing journey - and you alone are responsible for the quality of it. This is the day your life really begins.”
I like this post too, I think everyone asks themselves this question in one way or another. One of my favorite quotes is "The best part of life is when your family becomes your friend, and your friends become your family". It is true that sometimes it is inevitable for some people in life to grow apart because of various "happenings" in life. However, you can't live your life thinking "It's going to happen at some point so I might as well do it now". I think you should cherish it as long as you have it, and if it changes, let it happen on it's own.
I am using this quote in class tomorrow, thanks for the inspiration. I think too often we forget how much we looked forward to these days when we were young, awkward, and yearning for some semblance of freedom. Maybe it is not about the greener grass, but rather rekindling something that we lost in our youth and are unable to fully retrieve. Maybe instead of asking where our crew has gone, we should ask why we still care whether we eat lunch alone, or with the same comfortable faces. What are we really running from?
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home